Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Don't mind the penis on the wall

Well, it's been awhile and I thought, what better way to say hello again than sharing my home search with you! 
I mean, who doesn't want to see torn up drywall and penis graffiti on bedroom walls? 
Yes, you read that right. 
We have gone through a lot of transitions in the last 2 months. 
From finally putting our house on the market to looking at houses in Maple Valley. 
Making offers that were drowned out by other offers, to reevaluating our career path and considering moving to Kansas. 
Where we could buy a MANSION.
 A literal mansion for less than a 1970's split level in Seattle. 

Then coming to our senses and realizing that the Midwest needs to just curl up and die.
 I lived in Missouri once and swore I would never look back. 
And Kansas is dangerously close to Missouri. 
However, they do have Hobby Lobby. 
Their one saving Grace. Pun intended. 

In the end, we did a 180 and are now looking at homes North of Seattle. 
Think Lynnwood ( Lynnhood) Mukilteo, Edmonds, Mill Creek, Snohomish, Lake Stevens area. Yes, a far cry from Maple Valley right?! 
Anyway, the inventory up there is VERY different than what we had been looking at in the south end. 
So different that I just couldn't keep it to myself. 
So, here you go. 
We looked at 8 houses last night. 
None of them will be our future ex wife. 

House 1- Bank owned property aka diamond in the rough...or maybe just rough.
Let's start with the redeeming qualities:

Amazing detail throughout

Granite windowsills 

Chunky molding, arches and general fanciness

Delightful Wood inlays 

The downside?
The last owners obviously left angry and the odd additions and alterations made us think multiple families may have lived here, so it's just kind of an awkward layout.
 OH, and also the house is completely trashed. 
Gorilla glue in all the locks, running water left on to flood the bathroom, BB gun shot through windows, major rat problem in what looked to be a garage bay turned prep kitchen, bad MDF siding and well.....take a look.

Clark says "WTF Mom!"

There was tile here at one time....

Leaky ceiling 

Oh,it gets better. 
Just wait.

Is it food or feces? 
We will never know.


Yes, I can see past new drywall and paint.
New windows, doors, trim, appliances, counters, ceilings, banisters, fences and even exploding dicks. 
But for the low low price of 380k ( jokes) I don't think this is my future dwelling.

Will we ever find a place to live?!

Wednesday, July 16, 2014

The Bachelorette (party)

This month I had a few cake orders. 
I had the pleasure of making a *tasteful* bachelorette party cake, followed by a wedding cake.

To have & to hold.

The night out started with a Moonshine tasting at 2Bar in Sodo.
Then we headed to dinner at Cantina de San Patrico in Post Alley. 
Followed by Fados for drinks and dancing!

Smelling the mash

How cute is this idea. 
We each kissed the matte of the frame and signed our names under our lips.
Then the bride can put a photo of her night out in the frame to keep!

Tattoos that ended up sticking to everything

Shine bright like a diamond

The country themed wedding took place in Moses Lake at the Dunes!
Here is the wedding cake.
Looks pretty good for having taken a 4 hour car ride to Eastern Washington.

Congratulations to the happy couple!

Monday, July 7, 2014

WInner Winner Renton Dinner

Thank you for all your votes!
Clark won the Renton Report's Cutest kid contest.

Now, that we have dominated in the local competition, we will be moving on to full blown high glitz pageantry.
I intend to have Clark skipping around the stage like a show horse and blinking and nodding like valley girl.

Here is what Clark would look like in full glitz.

Calm down, it's just photoshop.

Anyway, when I received the message that we had won, I was told that next year would be bigger and better.
Well, I should hope so.
Not to poo poo Clark's cuteness, but there were only like 12 other entries!
Not to mention they allowed you to vote 10 times per day, which makes no sense.
It pretty much made this a popularity contest of who had more determined friends.
( Again, thank you!)
In the end there were really only 3 of us competing because all the other entries had fallen so far behind I am pretty sure they just gave up. 
We worked so hard to get to number one and then they print all 3 photos in the paper anyway.
Being a mostly noncompetitive person, I would have totally been content with 3rd place.

It obviously wasn't the great prizes I was after. 
All though a 100.00 visa card will buy some diapers or toys, I am not sure how a 25.00 coupon to the local Noodle House was the best they could come up with for 1st prize option for a kid contest.

How about a coupon for the Toy Store in the Landing? 
Your place on a float in the River Days Parade.

The prizes just don't make sense to me.
Also, since we are complaining here, the photo in the paper was poor quality.
I want a refund.
What did you say?
The Renton Reporter is free?

Damn it.

Fiesta like there's no manana

For Clark's second Birthday this year we had a Fiesta Themed party.
Even though Clark has no idea what that is and doesn't really even favor Mexican food.
I just thought it would be cute and it's not like he really knows what is going on anyway.
Bad Mom award here.
I tried to make up for it with a school bus cake.
 He is kind of obsessed with buses. 
And in case you are wondering, he loved the cake.
So there. 

Best of all, we had nice weather so we were able to be outside.
Which is a lot more fun now because we finished our backyard!

Time for some gifts!

Tennis racket & pajamas 

Lawn Mower!

Snuggling up in the new Ninja Turtles blanket

Clark got a recorder, drum and guitar

Aunt Claudia playing the recorder

Clark being totally impressed

The cake

Bentley in her Sombrero 

I made most of the decor from tissue paper

 I had big plans for a Pinata' but they were later squashed by Steve when he pointed out that we weren't inviting any other children to this party and it would be kind of weird and pointless.
So, we skipped that.

Thumbs up

Sun dancing 

Adult Drinking

Tequila soaked watermelon chunks filled the leftover shells of my pineapples!
Keepin' it green and recycling ya know.

Clark got a super cool sandbox from Oma & Grandpa!
The lid folds out into bench seats.

Happy 2nd Birthday Clark!