Monday, April 30, 2012

Nona says the darndest things


This weekend I went along with my mom on her weekly visit to see my Nona.
As far back as I can remember, she has always tried to force feed me.
It has gotten progressively worse since I have gotten older and now has reached its ultimate capacity with pregnancy.

Now that I am in my third trimester, my stomach has gotten considerably smaller from being squished by all other organs.
I can’t eat nearly what I did earlier and even prior to being pregnant.
I have mini meals and then basically feel starved in between.


After arriving at Nona’s house, she offered me coffee, but I already had my decaf Starbucks.
She said, “Well, then some cookies to go with it”.
I said “No, I  already ate breakfast.”
 She tried to push a slice of bread or how about some bologna?
“No… I am fine, thanks.”
She says “ Alright……” 
Five minutes pass, she asks if I would like a glass of milk.  
“No, I am fine and if I need anything, I will get it myself!” I reply.
She turns up her nose and wanders off.


We go to the grocery store where anything I touch or look at she asks if I need.
“No, Nona, I am just looking while you shop.”
She convinces me to get a pie for dessert though.
I said “ Only if you will eat some too! “  
She agrees .

Once we get back home she starts making lunch.
During which she offers me more cookies.
I have a few.
She tries to give me coffee, After refusing twice, I appease her by  taking a glass of milk.

We sit down to eat lunch and she hounds me that I need to eat more.
I am eating like “a little bird” she says.
 I tell her, “I am full already, my stomach is small right now.”
This doesn’t phase her, “ No, you are eating for two, you should eat more!
More!
The baby is hungry!
Here have some more!


I tell her “No, I am full, why don’t you believe me? I am 28, I know when I am full!” She is relentless and growls under her breath.
I'm all  “Nona, I really can’t eat anymore right now, when I burp, I throw up a little in my mouth”
She looks at me and without pause ,says
 “ Yeah, me too, it’s alright


As soon as I finish what is on my plate.
She says “ You want some pie?”  
“Yes, I will have some pie.”
“ Do you want some ice cream?”
“ No thank you.”
“ What’s wrong? Don’t you like ice cream?”
“ Yes, I do, but I will just have some pie.”
“ Well, why not with ice cream? Ice cream is good on pie!”
“Yes, Nona , it is ,but I will just have milk.”
She turns her nose up in disgust and gets the pie.


As soon as I am barely finished eating my slice, she says “ Have another slice”
I am still swallowing!
“ No, one piece is fine” .
” No it’s not, don’t you want some more?
You should have another slice.”  
So I make a compromise with her and ask if instead it would be alright if I took home a piece for later.
She says fine, but when I pack it up, she wants to know why I don’t take 2 pieces and how about 1 for Steve too.
I tell her Steve isn’t home, I just need one slice.
Plus, “You promised you would eat the pie too! If I take 3 pieces, it will all be gone.



 “Fine”, she says…
“But do you want some ice cream before you go?”

6 comments:

Becky said...

Lol. Omg she sounds like my great grandma. She is very cute!

Kiara Buechler said...

Oh my goodness, that is funny/sweet/annoying all at the same time. She is so cute though!

Anonymous said...

Sounds exhausting!

andrea said...

My Nana (Mom's Mom) did the EXACT same thing. Every time:
"Do you want a sandwich?"...."How about some Stew?"...."Some juice?"... "How 'bout Bon-bons?"..."Here, have a stick of Fruit-strip gum" (in her junk drawer @ ALL times)....

Also, she always forced money on us. "Here you go, grab yourself a burger" as she hands us $20 each....
Whenever we'd say "No, Nana...that's okay, we don't need $, but thank you...." she would then hide it in our pockets of our jackets when we weren't looking and we'd find it when we got home.

Gotta love Grandmas!! :)

Nikki said...

Hahah! Adorable! I never trust anything in my Grandmas fridge so I always turn down the offers ;)

graciepie said...

Yeah i made a sammich with peanutbutter i found at steves grandma's once and spit it out after one bite. Then looked at the jar which had expired 7 years earlier..